i was ashamed of them, i thought they weren't worth your time. i re-read the first page of your posts and realized how i fell for you. i forgot about them after i read them the first time, but they sank in. because of those posts you have a special place in my mind, like i know your special smell and i have been in your room and worried with you at your thoughts and all that. it's not that i liked everything i saw there. it's like, now you exist. it's such a frustration to think about you, but it still makes me happier. it's a pity that i have to do the project - i would write you a long tearful comment and maybe even turn it into a long tearful post. i'm not sure if i managed to convey my feelings, but i can't write this forever